Howdy howdy! I was chatting with another member about the stories and thought I'd post part of one of my replies here, seeings how I think it could be real constructive.
I'd love to discuss this kinda jazz with anybody who's willing to chat about it!
(Also please note that I'm not looking to offend or hurt anyone's feelings, as I know this stuff is a genuine outlet of creativity and REALLY isn't easy, but I think the criticism can be super helpful because the folks writing on the forum are worth it and deserve to be held to a high standard because of how good they are. <3 )
(Was discussing my story "Managing a Metal Mouth")
While I've seen the scam plot done in other stories, I'd much rather keep things pretty positive ( and even Wholesome) overall. Cynthia's character is designed to be a genuinely caring one who just happens to be a huge nerd for orthodontics. I wanted to introduce more of her family at some point, but present them as likeable, even bigger nerds than Cynthia, but never sinister. I had the same opinion about the disillusioned plot. I feel like "Person gets braces and hates them" is a little too common of a trope. While I tried to be semi-realistic with Gregory's initial reactions to them, if I were to continue this story, Cynthia would play a massive role in Greg developing a genuine liking for his braces and all that they represent. I considered giving some development to Dr. Collins and even involve Sarah in some orthodontic work of her own
There's certainly plenty I can do but I definitely don't want to do a few things:
My only criticism with the "Never been kissed" story is that I felt like it should've ended a while ago. There's a grace to be found in knowing when to end your story, so I'm definitely trying to be careful about letting my story go on for TOO long, ya know? While it was interesting to see the changes in perspective, it almost got too caught up in the sub-plots and lost the charm of what made me like the first few chapters. (Also I'm aware that the writer for these stories knows English as a second language, which makes the story even more impressive, but I want to maintain the same criticism, because I think they deserve to be held to the same standard, because they (and their story) really are that good.)
An even more common thing I see is folks putting out a REALLY GOOD start, but leaving it at just a start. The "Fine Print", "Short term pain for long term gain", and "Fixed Braces" stories all had this in common. I loved the beginning, but they never got past their beginnings, so I made sure to at least go somewhere with "Managing a Metal Mouth". If I do continue it, it might come in the form of a "Book 2" and I'll label the start as "Book 1" just to make sure that if I continue the story, you can read the individual sections one at a time, making them more digestible and easier to keep up with. I'm sure if the writer of "Never Been Kissed" did this it would help a ton to keep up with it.
I truly enjoyed writing the story, and even letting it write itself at some points. Experimenting with elements of foreshadowing even from the beginning was something I had a real good time with lol